Post 100

This blog if focally my 100th blog here on blog spot and my 200th blog total I have written since starting on myspace in 2007. I so wish the words I was writing next would make you want to jump up and down and cheer. But I am sorry to say it is not. It's the final nail in the coffin. I'm happy for friends that I can actually trust. I will say that much.


For some time know I have been fighting the wrong enemy. I have been blinded and deceived beyond imaginable reason. I have been forced to stab back with my own knife now. My knife is sharper and will stab deeper. I have no choice in this. I wanted to live my life in peace. I wanted simple. Actually as Skip calls it I wanted "Simple Stupid". I dontthink its too much to ask.

I filed all my things for our divorce in July. Something that needed to be done 3 year sago, but it's better it took longer and I do not regret the decision to wait. We needed it. Even tho there have been many trials and tests along the way. I happy with it.

Thomas and I had a WONDERFUL meeting today. We agreed on everything and we even talked. I'm happy for him. He's doing great in school and he actually has something to work for. That's a big step for him. Things should be final some time in November I believe. That's about where the good stops.

I had dinner with Christa and Bob tonite. They cooked a fantastic brisket. While I was in the kitchen talking to Christa she turned and looked at me with tears in her eyes and told me she had to tell me something because it was eating her up inside and she couldn't take it anymore.

The day I found out about Kansas my mother called Christa in tears and said she needed to talk to her right away. My mom drove all the way to Fountain and in front of Christa, Bob and Thomas told them the most disturbing lies about me and about Skip. She told all three of them Skip was a drunk, he was abusive and was mean to Aiden. She told them I was a terrible mom and wasn't capable of caring for my own son. She told them I was leaving and something had to be done to stop it. She told them Skip was just stringing me along and I was falling for something that would never work out, that he just wanted to get me out of here. My own mother told these people she has to get Aiden every weekend because I call freaking out. She said she lost count of all the times she had to come to my house because the situation was so bad. She told them Skip was using me for sex.

I cannot say I doubt a single word. Christa has a great memory and was able to repeat to me things that only my mom would say in the context my mom would say them. And Christa doesn't know my mom well enough to say them in those ways without knowing. This was the reason Thomas was such a butt about the whole situation weeks ago.

I am prepared for battle. I will not fight it in an open manner. It will have to be a fight thru simple actions, planted ideas and total brainwashing. Until I can safely get myself and Aiden from this place I will not be able to lay an open attack. But trust me, it's coming.

I know what side I am on know. I feel betrayed.