Saturday, July 3, 2010

Forgetting Myself

I had to take some serious time out this week and really evaluate why I was in such a bad mood.  Why I haven't been sleeping and why I feel like I am missing out on something.

Yes, I have a very serious PMS issue to deal with, but it's really more than that.  I have forgotten about me.  I haven't been taking care of myself physically or mentally and it's all coming to a head. I hadn't realized how much I really do enjoy my solitude and the time I have to just sit and think.  I have been so busy with Aiden, FaceBook, and my BlackBerry that it all just slipped thru my hands without me seeing it.  By the time I am settling down for the nite and off my phone and computer its after10 and I have had no time to just reflect on my own feelings and problems.  Then I just lay there unable to sleep because I feel like I have unfinished business that I didn't get done because I was too busy with other people.  I just can't allow that anymore.

I am taking my time back.  I have done well for 2 nites now.  Once Aiden is in bed I walk away from the computer and I stop answering my phones rings, pings, dings and every other noise it makes.  Now if only I could get people to understand that if I don't answer that means I am not available, don't keep sending messages or calling.

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